Cori and I thought it would be simple to book our first Bed & Breakfast experience. We were categorically wrong.
Art by Pete Whitehead
Listen Free: | Apple Podcasts | Pandora | Stitcher | Spotify |
Story: Aaron Calafato
Direction: Aaron Calafato & Cori Birce
Audio Production: Ken Wendt
Original Music: Nature Camp
Podcast Coordinator: Cori Birce
Creative Consultant: Anthony Vorndran
TRANSCRIPT
TheBed&BreakfastPart1.mp3 - powered by Happy Scribe
When Cori and I were recovering from Covid this past holiday season, we did what any normal couple who had high fevers and we're facing a traumatic situation would do. We picked a date, months in the future and booked a bed and breakfast in our own hometown. Now, there were several reasons why we did this. One, we just wanted to be able to celebrate if we were able to survive this thing, being alive, being together, it was sort of romantic. But at the same time, we could be safe doing it. It was close to our house. We were close to the kids, but it felt like we were away. We could be isolated, not that many people. It seemed like a perfect fit. The other thing was we were both really curious about bed and breakfasts. Neither of us had ever been to one. Cori was obsessed with this particular bed and breakfast in the town where we live. And I was to only because I had traveled around the country and stayed in hotels in almost every state. I just had never been to a bed and breakfast. And so I remember as soon as I clicked the reservation button and it got confirmed, a bunch of questions started spinning in my head about the breakfast factor. So, when I associate bed and breakfast, I associate those two things bed and breakfast. So I thought to myself, do they bring you breakfast in bed? Do they bring breakfast to your door? Do you have to order the breakfast? Is there a menu? Where do you get it? Do you have to reserve the breakfast? Is the breakfast available only at certain times? Is it only available the next day when you check out? Can you only get it one time? What about three times? Is it a breakfast buffet all day? These were things that were spinning in my head and I was driving myself crazy because I didn't want to miss the breakfast. I didn't want to screw the breakfast thing up because that's what makes the bed and breakfast, a bed and breakfast.
So, when I got a detailed confirmation email a couple of weeks later, I was really excited because I thought it would answer a lot of my questions. Except after I got done reading it, things started to get even more weird.
I got a greeting email from the bed and breakfast. Can I read it to
yes, please.
It says: Greetings from the (not gonna say it) we are pleased to accept your reservation and look forward to accommodating you. Check-in is available any time after 4 p.m. Private guest parking can be found in our visitors lot to the right of the garage.
Oh,
keys and all check instructions or information will be in the mailbox on the front porch. Just look for the envelope with your last name on it.
Uh-Oh.
So
panic. I'm panicking. Wait a minute.
Was my my thought. Well, are you nervous about what I'm nervous about. Which is...
Ghosts?
(Laughs) How did you get ghosts from that?
Are we going to be alone in the house?
That's what I'm thinking. Why would we need keys, in an envelope, like, do you think that it's...Are the keys to the room or keys to the entire bed and breakfast?
I don't think they would give us the keys to the whole place.
Then why wouldn't there be a person at the front desk or in the house? Wouldn't they just have the keys there in the house? Why would they be in the mailbox?
I don't know. I've never been to a bed and breakfast in my life. I have no idea what we're doing.
This is what I'm saying.
So just to jump in here real quick, despite some of these questions, we were still committed to go. But Cori has a skill of like having premonitions and things like that. And a day before we were about to leave, she drops this information on me.
OK, I've hit record. Should I be scared? What's going on? What's happening?
I was just like looking up reviews of the bed and breakfast and it pulled up...
Oh, God, it's bad.
No, it's not. Every, actually it has like a ton of five star ratings, like everyone loves it. But there's like tons of website articles about how haunted it is...
Oh God no.
And that the piano plays by itself in the middle of the night and that doors slam and that. Um...Yeah, I don't know if you've met me. I'm afraid of everything.
So what do we do?
Well, we're going to go. It's not far. If we get really scared, we'll just leave.
Oh, God no...
Are you actually scared or are you more scared about me being scared?
I'm scared about me.
Well, I need you to be the tough one.
All right. I'm tough. We're going.
I really want to go, but I just, like, it says there's two specific rooms that are extra haunted and I don't think that one of them is the one we're staying in. OK, because, you know, the rooms have names. So that's why I just I got to double check.
We might just be up all night, but that's OK.
Maybe we should bring, like, an extra recording device.
Yeah
And see if we can, like, catch any spooky stuff on it.
I'm going to bring it.
You should.
We're ghost hunters. We didn't even know we would be ghost hunters.
I don't really want to be a ghost hunter, but I'm kind of interested. Like, what if the piano starts playing? There was also a review that said they had great snacks and great breakfast. So I think we're good!
So, we were all in. And we started our long journey, a five mile drive to the bed and breakfast.
So where do I turn?
You turn left.
Is this it right here?
No, I think we park in the front.
That's a bed and breakfast.
Well, I know this is the yes, this is the building, but I think the parking is around the other corner.
Really?
I believe. I've never actually been here, but I lived near it the entirety of my life
There is no entry point point here.
Oh yeah. They haven't shoveled or anything. But we're supposed to park right in here. You just drove past it.
Are you sure?
Yeah. It's to the right of the garage is what it says.
To the right of the garage? Oh, God.
It's kind of weird that they didn't shovel.
Is there anybody there? That's the question.
I mean, it doesn't matter as long as our keys are there.
OK, so we're parked or inside. Have our bags. There's nobody here.
Not a soul.
No one to greet us.
Nope.
But they've left a note.
There's a note. Would you like me to read the note?
Yes, please. Read that note.
OK, so as I already read outside, but it was cold. - (Reads note) The front door is currently unlocked. Come on in. (Which we have done and now we're in the foyer or entryway, something like that. I don't know what this would be called, but it's cool. And there's two hats on the wall. That's exciting.) If you will be out past 10:00 p.m., you'll need a code to unlock the first set of doors. (That's the code blah, blah, blah. I don't know if we'll be out past 10:00 p.m.) Our suites upstairs to the left, second door on the right, it's the Evelyn Suite. The gold key will unlock (slash) lock the deadbolt on your sweet door. At the top of the stairs is a coffee bar. Help yourself to tea, hot chocolate sauce and bottled water, fruit and V8 juice. (Yum). We have a pretty full house this evening.
Hold on. What do you mean full house?
I think that means there's other guests.
Well, who?
I don't know other people that are coming to stay, but they're not here yet. Maybe they're ghosts.
Stop. I don't see anybody here.
You can check in but you can never check out!!!
Stop. I don't see anybody here, though.
Well, maybe we got here, like, promptly at 4:00.
OK.
(Reads) As well as staff on site. So don't be alarmed if you hear people throughout the house.
Oh...
That's to just say, they're just saying that in case it's ghosts, I'm sure of it. (Reads) Once you're settled, call texting. It's a good time for breakfast. (The thing you're most excited about) I can do as early as 7 a.m. and as late as 10 a.m. if you need anything at all, please don't hesitate to contact me no matter what time it may be. Wow!
(Noise on stairs/Footsteps)
You ready to go upstairs?
Did you just hear that?
Do you hear footsteps?
Hold on. Did you literally just hear that?
I hear like the wooshing of wind and something like knocking.
I think someone who came in through the front door. It's probably a guest, right? OH GOD!
Tune in next week for part two of the bed and breakfast!
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